- Home
- News Grid
- Local News
- Green Hawk
- Politics
- School Zone
- Youth Camps
- Nonprofits
- Missing Pets
- Multimedia
- Arts
- Movies
- Outdoors
- Sports
- News Releases
- Columnists
- Blogs
- Opinions
- Classifieds
- Advertise
- Donate
- Partners
She Said, Z Said: Have You Picked Your Sport Yet?
Z: Oh, no! I completely forgot! Has Koss picked his sport yet?
She: Huh?
Z: He’s 10. He has to have picked his sport by now.
She: Does jumping on the couch count?
Z: He needs to focus. He needs to choose soccer, basketball, baseball or football, and he’s got to start practicing every week. And we need to find him a private coach.
She: He’s 10.
Z: Exactly. We’re already two years late. We are bad parents.
She: I think you need to take a time-out here, honey. He’s 10.
Z: Exactly. We’re way behind. He hasn’t been training.
She: What are you talking about? He runs around and jumps and kicks things and throws things all the time. That’s what 10 year olds are supposed to be doing.
Z: You don’t understand. He’s 10, and he hasn’t picked his sport yet. What are we going to do?
She: Throw a Frisbee and then have some ice cream?
Z: Now he’ll never get on that club team, which means he won’t get on that high school team, which rules out getting scouted for college, which means no scholarship, which means he’s going to be unloved, unemployed and alone.
She: Overreact much?
Z: You don’t love him. You don’t want him to be a winner.
She: Let me tell you a little story. I have a friend whose daughter likes to play some sports, and likes to dance. So, she does what she likes. This year, her sophomore year in high school, she decided to try volleyball.
Z: You can’t start playing a sport in high school. That’s crazy talk.
She: She’s 5’11” and coordinated. She’s already getting scouted by colleges. And she’s having fun.
Z: That’s not fair. She’s tall and athletic.
She: Exactly. Sports aren’t all about fair. The big, tall, naturally athletic kids can do what they want when they want to. Many of them focus on a sport early because they’re already good at it and they love it, and more power to them.
Z: Man, that’s really got to annoy the parents who pushed their kids into volleyball when they were 7, got them a coach and a club team, and then their ungrateful children didn’t clear 5’2”.
She: That’s why the parents — ahem, coaches — who win at all costs drive me crazy. The worst kids’ coach in the world is the one who wins all their games, but who leaves half the kids on the team not wanting to play the sport anymore.
Z: But isn’t winning what makes it fun for the kids?
She: Not at all. They mostly just like running around and playing with their friends.
Z: We want our kid to be a winner. Winning is better.
She: Not for the kids who are sitting on the bench when they’re only 10 years old, and not for the 8 year olds who have Screamy McScreamerson for their first Little League coach.
Z: When did you become such a Communist?
She: They’re 10, or 12, or 8, and they’re not getting paid to be there. Who knows what their body is going to turn out to be like, or when they might suddenly figure out how to put together all of their previously awkward body motions. The only thing you know for sure is that if Coach Crazy McTooSerious kills the love of the game for them, then you’ll never find out.
Z: Huh. OK. You might have a point. So, do you think we should find Koss a coach for couch jumping?
She: Yes, dear.
— Share your backseat parenting theories with She and Z by e-mailing .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).
Comments
Noozhawk's comments are moderated, but by posting here you accept your responsibility to follow our rules.
- No abusive, defamatory or libelous attacks. In plain English: No personal attacks.
- No vulgar or discriminatory language.
- If you do not follow these rules, don't be surprised if your comment is removed.
- Please use the Report Abuse button on offensive comments.
- Share what you know, ask about what you don't. Give us your eyewitness accounts, observations, background and history. Tell us what else you want to know about the story.
- Stay on the topic, PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CAPS LOCK, and forgive people their spelling errors.
Noozhawk's intent is not to limit the discussion of our stories but to elevate it. Thank you for your respectful participation. Click here for our complete Terms of Use.
Comments are moderated, and will not appear until they've been approved.
» on 11.23.09 @ 09:47 AM
Clubs sports are ruining everything.
» on 11.23.09 @ 12:19 PM
This whole specialization thing is terrible.
» on 11.23.09 @ 04:32 PM
While some kids are so good at a certain sport they really need to have that extraordinary competition, for the most part club sports are about parents’ egos and coaches making a lot of money. I wish this whole kid sport culture would change back into a neighborhood/school activity. We would all have a lot more free time, save the environment because of less driving and everyone - parents and kids - would be much happier!
» on 11.23.09 @ 04:36 PM
Thanks for the perspective on this. I have seen parents rant and rave and generally act like idiots over their kids’ sports.
» on 11.23.09 @ 06:05 PM
I’d also like a couch coach.
» on 11.24.09 @ 11:01 AM
I agree, this specialization thing is out of control and besides that, it’s ruining kids arms at a very early age and sometimes affecting their growth.
» on 11.24.09 @ 04:27 PM
If you find a good couch jumping consultant can you let us all know?
» on 11.24.09 @ 05:57 PM
It’s the parents and their egos that are making this so tough on all of us. I wish everyone would just start playing with their school or neighborhood teams and then we could stop all of this club sports craziness.
» on 11.25.09 @ 01:41 PM
I completely agree with Janna’s comment. Why do kids’ sports have to be so complicated (and so competitive for that matter)? When I was a kid we played with our neighbors and our parents almost never had to drive us anywhere, let alone miles away from home for a soccer game or swim meet. I don’t see a huge rash of Olympic athletics or even college level players coming out of all this hyperactivity, so seriously, what is the point?
» on 11.25.09 @ 04:56 PM
Bravo for you guys for speaking up about this in a humorous way. Maybe some of those nutzo parents will get the hint and ease up on their poor kids.
» on 11.25.09 @ 05:08 PM
I’m so glad someone finally wrote about this absurd practice of people driving their children all over the state to run around on a soccer field. Thanks!
» on 11.25.09 @ 11:20 PM
I live in the Bay Area and this column has been circulating around our club soccer team. I agree it’s crazy but the pressure to participate is so strong, it’s hard to be the one parent who says no first. Thanks for brining this to light in a humorous way.
» on 11.25.09 @ 11:22 PM
Having kids used to be seen as just a part of life, but now they’re how people define themselves. That’s why so much ego gets spent on kids’ sports. Hopefully (funny) columns like this will make people have a little more perspective on all this.
» on 11.27.09 @ 11:46 AM
Here I sit a soccer tournament reading this. The irony of family time that’s turned into driving and sitting around time for me, the so-called supportive parent. Thanks for bringing some light to this—albeit in a silly way. Seriously, someone needs to stop with the club sports, the elite teams, the driving all over state. I’m tired and I don’t think the kids are having MORE fun.
» on 11.28.09 @ 05:44 PM
This is a real problem. Even kids who don’t participate in club sports have to choose one sport if they want to play any sport in high school ... which starts in ninth grade now.
Kids’ bodies and minds aren’t mature enough for this. Kids should be able to try several sports and not have to “major” in a sport when they’re 14 years old. Sports in high school should give them backgrounds they can use their entire lives .... and maybe even excel in as their bodies and minds develop.
Another problem is, that if they aren’t “stars” in high school, kids see little playing time. Coaches (backed by school personnel, some parents, and the press) choose the “elite” from the junior varsity teams rather than put into the games those kids who have practiced diligently (which means year-round now) for years.
» on 11.29.09 @ 09:40 AM
Thank you for this one.
Fitness is obviously important but somewhere along the line we’ve turned sports from something that may have been fun for kids into an Olympic ego event for parents and careers for P.E. majors.
The intramural idea is the perfect solution except for the fact that there’s no money in it so it won’t ever get any legs. The schools’ athletic teams are using every square inch of practice space so that the kids who don’t make the sanctioned teams have nowhere to go to play a game of pick-up ball. Areas where there may be room for kids to play have no money for supervision or insurance to cover the risk.
Any of you good at couch jumping? I hear there’s a family looking for a coach. It would make a good side job in this down economy…Yep. Club teams must have been dollar driven, and fueled by parent insecurity and the convenience of turning over a job to a subcontractor. How do we get out of this mess?
» on 11.29.09 @ 10:03 AM
Thank you for this one.
Fitness is obviously important but somewhere along the line we’ve turned sports from something that may have been fun for kids into an Olympic ego event for parents and careers for P.E. majors.
The intramural idea is the perfect solution except for the fact that there’s no money in it so it won’t ever get any legs. The schools’ athletic teams are using every square inch of practice space so that the kids who don’t make the sanctioned teams have nowhere to go to play a game of pick-up ball. Areas where there may be room for kids to play have no money for supervision or insurance to cover the risk.
Any of you good at couch jumping? I hear there’s a family looking for a coach. It would make a good side job in this down economy…Yep. Club teams must have been dollar driven, and fueled by parent insecurity and the convenience of turning over a job to a subcontractor. How do we get out of this mess?
» on 11.29.09 @ 12:02 PM
I coached gymnastics for about a decade, over 20 years ago, and got out of it for exactly these reasons. To me, it was about being active, swinging around like a monkey, playing with friends, learning some coordination and discipline, doing the best you could do. To too many parents, it was about focusing on the gifted kids and training them to be Olympic athletes, whether that was what the kids wanted or not.
When sports are fun, you try them all—swimming, bicycling, running, hiking, back-packing, shooting, snorkeling, boogey-boarding… (Please note, these are all activities, not team “game” sports.) I still do all the ones that my knees can handle at 50+. Being active and playing with other friends is STILL what sports are about to me. I feel blessed to have this perspective, and have so little competitive in me that I avoid team sports with winners and losers.
Teach your kids to experience joy in movement and active outdoor activities, alone or shared with friends.
» on 11.29.09 @ 07:41 PM
This is obviously such a thought-provoking subject. It would be wonderful if Noozhawk or one the news outlets could do an investigative story about kids sports, club teams and the impact on family life.
More Local News »
She Said, Z Said: Sweet 16 ... and the Smell of Sweaty Socks
A milestone anniversary that officially breaks with a tradition of nongifts
She Said, Z Said: Cashing In on S**t His Dad Says
Hey, if a 29-year-old can get some sweet treats for his tweets, why can't we?
She Said, Z Said: In Verizon vs. Cox, We All Lose Patience
Looking for better Internet, phone and TV service, don't forget to give yourself plenty of time
She Said, Z Said: The TV Reality Is There’s No Escape
Television lineup just goes to show you that we may have to get with the program
She Said, Z Said: Film Festival Questions Full of Whack
Everyone's a screenwriter when there's an open mic
Weather: Fair 58.0º
Search Noozhawk »
