Michaele Carnahan, 1947-2008
A memorial service will be held at the Santa Barbara Mission at 9 a.m. Aug. 8.
Michaele Carnahan, who died unexpectedly of a heart attack at age 61 while on a flight to Atlanta on Wednesday, spent her life quietly taking care of other people’s problems. She would have been embarrassed about all of the attention she’s received and apologetic for any trouble and inconvenience she might have caused.
In addition to managing two offices with five doctors and 15 staff members, Michaele ran a maxillofacial surgery educational foundation. Her work brought her into contact with orthodontists, surgeons and patients from all over the world. The tributes to her that have come in from near and far all speak of her warmth, kindness and professionalism.
Dr. Lance Mason wrote from New Zealand, “She was a dear and wonderful woman, a bullet-proof friend, and an irreplaceable and invaluable asset to her job, which was always far more than a job to her — it was a devoted career for which hundreds of professionals are indebted, and the lives of thousands of patients around the world are profoundly enhanced and enriched.”
Michaele bought a home in Ventura in 2003 and was active in her parish church there. She was very close to family, and traveled to Florida frequently to visit her three sisters and their children. In 1992, she lost her son and only child, Sean, to bacterial meningitis when he was a 22-year-old student at Cal Poly.
In fact, two days after Michaele’s death, the passenger who was seated next to her called the office where she worked. He wanted to share with Michaele’s employers what a lovely, joyful person she was and how delighted he was to meet her.
The man said that for three hours she chatted animatedly with him, mostly about her job and the people she works with. He also wanted her friends and colleagues to know that she seemed very happy and comfortable while they talked during the first half of the flight. He awoke just before landing when Michaele quietly stepped in front of him to go to the lavatory. Even then, she showed no sign of urgency or distress. If she had been feeling ill, it would have been just like Michaele to try not to bother anyone, and to keep it to herself.
A memorial service will be held at the Santa Barbara Mission at 9 a.m. Friday. Michaele will be buried next to her son, Sean, at Mission Cemetery in San Luis Obispo.
Sally Warner-Arnett is a friend of Michaele Carnahan’s. Her husband, Dr. Bill Arnett, is a partner in the Center for Corrective Jaw Surgery.
» wrote on 08/05/08 @ 10:44 AM
Pretty tacky to run an Express Jet ad with this story…
» wrote on 08/05/08 @ 05:39 PM
Santa Barbara has lost a treasure. We all need to remember every day is a gift ans live as it is your last.
» wrote on 08/05/08 @ 11:28 PM
I was Michaele’s husband from 1969 to 1979. She was a very energetic, joyful and healthy person during our time together. I am the father of her only son, who died tragically in 1992. I haven’t seen her since then and haven’t kept in touch. I have since re-married and moved to Virginia and have 3 more children. This story touches my heart as I did not know what she had been doing, she simply said she worked with Dr’s. That seems extremely understated as Sally has described here, which would be a comment on Michaele’s ethic. I wish her and her 4 surviving sisters peace. She has come home to Sean Michael, rejoice.
» wrote on 08/06/08 @ 10:48 AM
Mickey was such a wonderful person. I only knew her as I was growing up. Her son Sean was my brother. She was always so sweey and nice to me when we would pick him up on occas.I hope my story will help al of you - Sean’s birthday is Feb. 18, 1970 and he died on Feb. 25 1992. Since I live in PA, I can’t visit his grave so, I go buy him his birthday balloon and write on it and send it up to him. I also do the same on the anniv. of his death. It has been a great feeling and has helped with the loss of him a lot. I bet Mickey would love it to if ya’ll could do that for her. I BET SHE WAS SMILING AND SO HAPPY TO SEE SEAN!!!
» wrote on 08/08/08 @ 01:38 PM
I met Michaele shortly after she arrived in Santa Barbara. Knowing her has been a real gift both professionally and personally. When my husband passed away last year, she helped me to understand I was not alone. She knew what the loss meant and lent a caring ear in our conversations.
The service today was beautiful. The outpouring of love shown by all who were there and those who could not be there will never be forgotten. And we will never forget our special and precious Michaele. Go with God, dear one.
» wrote on 08/19/08 @ 09:53 AM
I got to know Michaele by phone, before I met her in person. She coordinated with my office staff, so that I could take trips with Dr. Arnett to all parts of the world. Were he not such a good friend and were we not on the other side of the country, my office staff suggested we try to hire her away from him. That’s how much they liked her.
» wrote on 08/19/08 @ 08:19 PM
Mikey was a very special cousin. I remember, as a child, she would spend a little special time with me at family reunions. I’m sure she did the same for everyone but at the time it felt that it was just for me. I will especially be grateful to her for helping me during a very scary time when my daughter needed jaw surgery. She listened to my fears, gave me the important questions to ask my doctors and made sure they were up to date with the latest procedures. I will always have a special love in my heart for her.
» wrote on 08/31/08 @ 12:51 AM
This is in memories of my loving and most caring Aunt Mickey , we all miss you and love you very much just like you say we’ll leave the light burning for you. I found this poem when my grandfather passed away and I always try to live my day by it. But I feel that I didn’t get to say that last good bye to my aunt, and I never would have dreamed that I wouldn’t never get another chance. So to all that read this take advantage of what you have today life is not worth waiting until tomorrow
IF I KNEW
If I knew it would be the last time
That I’d see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.
If I knew it would be the last time
that I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
and call you back for one more.
If I knew it would be the last time
I’d hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would video tape each action and word,
so I could play them back day after day.
If I knew it would be the last time,
I could spare an extra minute
to stop and say “I love you,”
instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.
If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
Well I’m sure you’ll have so many more,
so I can let just this one slip away.
For surely there’s always tomorrow
to make up for an oversight,
and we always get a second chance
to make everything just right.
There will always be another day
to say “I love you,”
And certainly there’s another chance
to say our “Anything I can do?”
But just in case I might be wrong,
and today is all I get,
I’d like to say how much I love you
and I hope we never forget.
Tomorrow is not promised to anyone,
young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance
you get to hold your loved one tight.
So if you’re waiting for tomorrow,
why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes,
you’ll surely regret the day,
That you didn’t take that extra time
for a smile, a hug, or a kiss
and you were too busy to grant someone,
what turned out to be their one last wish.
So hold your loved ones close today,
and whisper in their ear,
Tell them how much you love them
and that you’ll always hold them dear
Take time to say “I’m sorry,”
“Please forgive me,” “Thank you,” or “It’s okay.”
And if tomorrow never comes,
you’ll have no regrets about today.
» wrote on 09/04/08 @ 12:23 PM
We were anxiously awaiting Mikey’s arrival on that Wednesday morning, looking forward to catching up on the happenings from the previous couple of months since we were all last together, when we heard the unbelievable news! It was as though it had to be a mistake, not Mikey, she was on her way to a family wedding and a fun filled extended weekend. Scheduling appointments for wedding preperations, shopping with her sisters, planning on bringing some items to her condo and just visiting real time with us all...which we always cherished so much! It didn’t happen. We cried, and still do. We miss you so much...as do many others as well. You touched so many in ways which will always be friendly, warm, comforting reminders of you in our hearts.
A glass of a good Chard...with a toast to you and Sean.
Always....