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Michelle Malkin: The Super-Sized Census Boondoggle
If only the federal government were as responsible with our money as Pepsi is with its money. The soda giant has been in the Super Bowl ad business for more than two decades. But this year, Pepsi determined it was economically unwise to pay $3 million for a 30-second spot. So, who’s foolish enough to pay for Super Bowl gold-plated airtime? You and me and Washington, D.C.
The U.S. Census Bureau will squander $2.5 million on a half-minute Super Bowl ad starring D-list celebrity Ed Begley Jr., plus two pre-game blurbs and 12-second “vignettes” featuring Super Bowl anchor James Brown. It’s a drop in the census boondoggle bucket (otherwise known as the tax-subsidized National Democratic Future Voter Outreach Drive).
The Obama White House has allocated $340 million toward an “unprecedented” promotional blitz for the 2010 census. That’s on top of $1 billion in stimulus money siphoned off for increased census “public outreach” and staffing. In all, the census will triple its total 2000 budget to $15 billion.
Ads pimping the census have already appeared during the Golden Globe awards and will broadcast during the Daytona 500 and NCAA Final Four championships. Some $80 million will be poured into multilingual ads in 28 languages from Arabic to Yiddish. Racial and ethnic groups have been squabbling over their share of the pie.
The U.S. census is a decennial census mandated by our Constitution. Should Americans know about it? Sure. Should the public-relations budget become a bottomless slush fund in recessionary times? Surely not.
Yet, no matter how you translate it, the census commercials to date have been an “Ishtar”-style flop. Global ad agency Draftfcb, based in Chicago (President Barack Obama’s hometown) and New York, nabbed a $200 million, four-year contract to oversee the Census Bureau’s direct marketing, online and offline general market media strategies.
The agency hired comedian Christopher Guest to direct “viral” spots. One of the supposedly “humor-driven” videos directed by Guest and commissioned by Draftfcb was uploaded to YouTube a few weeks ago. It has racked up a measly 6,880 views.
“For a once-a-decade project involving every living American, that’s a pretty crummy return on investment,” AdFreak’s David Griner jeered. “The video seems to be hampered by the same problem that plagues all campaigns meant to ‘go viral’ — i.e., it’s simply not that funny. … The joke is a chuckler at best, and dragged out to three minutes, that chuckle gets spread pretty thin.”
According to independent census watchdog Stephen Morse, the feds conducted 115 focus groups in 37 markets across the country before settling on the dud of an ad.
That’s a lot of focus-grouping to get people to pay a little extra attention to government headcount questionnaires that will be coming straight to their mailboxes.
Taxpayers are also footing the bill for the Mother of all Government Junkets — a three-month road trip by lucky-ducky Census Bureau flacks traveling in 13 buses and cargo vans with trailers. They’ll be partying in New Orleans for Mardi Gras and at parades across the country. In case you were wondering about the anticipated Census Road Show carbon footprint, it’s an estimated 223 metric tons.
But not to worry: The eco-teers of an Al Gore-endorsed carbon offset firm called “Carbonfund.org” have become official government “partners” with the census to offset all the vehicle emissions — and surf off the free publicity to garner more business.
As if overpriced TV ads, online videos no one watches and indulgent, cross-country caravans weren’t enough, the Census Bureau is also enlisting 56 million schoolchildren to pester their parents and act as junior government enumerators. Educrats are spending several billions of dollars more on math and social studies lessons peddling the census. Overzealous census partners such as the National Association of Latino Elected Officials have distributed recruitment propaganda urging constituents to participate because “Joseph and Mary participated in the census.” Goodness knows what kind of fear-mongering curricula the kids are being served in the name of counting heads — and shaping the electoral landscape.
“When times are tough, you tighten your belts,” Obama lectured us. “You don’t blow a bunch of cash in Vegas.”
Coincidentally, the Census Road Tour junketeers just wrapped up a visit in Vegas. Next stop? You guessed it: the Super Bowl in Miami. Taxpayers should start crying foul.
— Michelle Malkin is author of Unhinged: Exposing Liberals Gone Wild. Click here for more information. She can be contacted at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).
» wrote on 02.07.10 @ 09:17 PM
BIG concern about oversight of many who will be hired to do the census. Will ACORN be involved ? They were to be until their RECENT scandal. How many Donald Ducks/Mickey Mouses’ can be registered, and vote. Am I being too cynical?
» wrote on 02.07.10 @ 10:25 PM
Its wonderful to hear Ms. Malkin serve as a fiscal watchdog ferreting out government waste. Wow, so the feds are once again going to spend money on the once-a-decade national census. But this time the expenditures to accomplish this necessary task is being presided over by a “socialist” even more threatening than George W. Bush, Obama’s predecessor. Bush you’ll remember instantly became the world’s biggest socialist when he took over U.S. banks with taxpayer money as his second term was mercifully ending with an economic meltdown not seen since his father and Reagan rounded out the 1980’s with the savings and loan debacle. Funny how Malkin is so careful with taxpayer money when the Democrats are in power. Usually she’s fine with massive government spending at the clip of tens of billions a month, as long as its on wars that dump untold profits into defense contractors in a manner that are absolutely emblematic of waste. So, which is it Michelle? Big government in the style of “spend and bomb” Reagan and Bush or money spent on domestic projects that might have a chance to stimulate the economy, employ workers here at home and create new opportunities? I know, you’d perfer to see our tax dollars end up in the sands of foreign lands.
» wrote on 02.08.10 @ 01:38 PM
to Watchdog Malkin…
Huh? What is your point?
This is supposed to be a Census, not a (expensive) Circus.
» wrote on 02.08.10 @ 02:25 PM
Ms. Malkin,
While you are correct about Pepsi pulling out of this year’s Super Bowl, you are not being completely honest with your readers when it comes to the reason for this spending shift.
According to a recent article in “Mashable,” the Pepsi move had more to do with the company’s desire to focus it’s efforts on trying to do something positive for the country:
“Rather than spending money on a Super Bowl ad, Pepsi will launch the Pepsi Refresh Project on January 13, 2010. At that time, users can submit their ideas to Pepsi for ways to refresh their communities, making the world a better place.”
And…
“Voting will begin on February 1, 2010, and the projects that get the most votes will be funded by Pepsi. Pepsi expects to spend $20 million to fund thousands of projects.”
For the record, Pepsi has spent around $142 million dollars on Super Bowl ads over the last decade. I seriously doubt that the company would have had any real problem with spending another $3 million for an ad this year.
To their credit, Pepsi’s management has identified a real need in this country, and they’re taking steps to do what they can to address it. Your attempt to turn this worthy effort into something political is really unfortunate. I think you owe Pepsi an apology!
» wrote on 02.08.10 @ 07:17 PM
Arnold, Pepsi is a corporation and their intent is to make money, period. If they do good at all it is only because they have figured a way to make money out of that good. Do not get me wrong. I have no problem with Pepsi making money (that’s what business is in business for) nor do I have a problem with them capitalizing on doing good things. Just want to give your “oh, they’re so cool” attitude a slight correction.
Malkin is the watchdog here, and the observations by someone feigning that role are thusly skewed.
» wrote on 02.08.10 @ 07:58 PM
Gee, I wonder why anyone would want the census to be a big under-count? Who would gain and who would lose by that?
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