Tuesday, March 20 , 2018, 7:16 am | Overcast 52º


Susan Ann Darley: Changing the Lens of Your Perception

Years ago I moved from one house to another and in the process gave up my large, spacious bedroom with a lush and comfortable king-size bed. My new bedroom had just enough room enough for a single bed.

Sleepless and wide awake at 3 a.m. while laying in bed on the first night I thought to myself, “This is not going to work.” I require wide-open spaces with lots of breathing room.

Then I had an epiphany and realized what needed to change was not the bed or room size but my perception. With that awareness and the willingness to change my thinking, I felt a subtle but definite internal shift accompanied by a wave of peace.

Did acceptance of that situation mean that I would be sentenced to a single-bed reality forever? No, but my acceptance allowed me to sleep well in it as long as it was necessary.

Today I remind myself of that experience when I find myself battling my present moment and trying to force change. All it does is escalate my anxiety level into red alert mode, which is never a healthy place from which to make sound and sane decisions.

Do you ever battle with your present circumstance? I’ll share with you what I learned from my experience.

Accepting your current situation is the key to peace of mind. Why? Because acceptance allows you to see clearly what needs to change. It’s literally like putting on a new pair of glasses. The desire for change is still there, but the mad rush to do so is quelled.

Quieting the personality and curbing the desire to grasp for instant outer gratification is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. When you are relaxed and calm, you become receptive to your internal guidance — the road map of your life. Your intuition is heightened, solutions appear and the quality of your life improves.

With acceptance of your situation you quit fighting it. Fear is reduced and panic subsides. Attachment to appearances and the way you want it to be now begins to lessen its menacing grip. Your renewed state of mind then gives you the willingness to assess what is needed to improve the outer picture.

For instance, if you’re stuck in an uncomfortable situation because of finances, habitually bouncing checks, compulsively and carelessly spending what you earn, and/or drowning in accrued interest from loans and credit cards, you need to 1) accept there is a problem and 2) muster the willingness to change.

You can look away from the problem or like a gladiator on steroids charge ahead to “fix” the situation now, but it won’t. Honest assessment and the willingness to change now will.

What is bothering you in your life? What would you like to change? Begin with a change of perception and view the current chapter of your life as the greatest opportunity you might ever have to grow beyond past patterns.

Your life situation with all its messiness is your greatest blessing when you face it head-on instead of sweeping it under the rug. Acceptance of it gives you the courage to peak under the rug and clean up your house, ultimately propelling you into new and welcomed circumstances.

Susan Ann Darley is a creativity coach and business writer who works with entrepreneurs and artists from all disciplines to build, manage and market their careers. Click here for more information, or contact her at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) or 805.845.3036. Click here to read previous columns. The opinions expressed are her own.

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