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Thursday, December 13 , 2018, 5:02 pm | Fair 72º


She Said, Z Said: Musicals Have My Numbers, but They’re All Gleek to Me

Shouting out with 'Glee' gives us a chance to wax lyrically

She: I feel pretty. Oh, so pretty. I feel pretty, and witty, and Gleek!

Z: I went to our column, and a Broadway musical broke out.

She: That’s only because I went to watch TV, and a Broadway musical broke out. I love the Fox TV show Glee. I am a Gleek.

Z: Glee. Singular sensation. Every little step it takes.

She: What was that?

Z: I’ll confess. I, too, am a Gleek. What’s not to love?

She: This is why we stay married.

Z: It’s cheating a little bit, though. Even though I know that Glee doesn’t have the greatest story-telling skills, musicals get all sorts of bonus points for me, so it doesn’t always matter how good it is.

She: Oh, it’s good. Even though most of the women are conniving and ruthless and all the men are milquetoast, it’s good. Sue Sylvester is my new anti-hero.

Z: And I love every minute when Rachel is singing. That girl could sing the dictionary and make me cry.

She: She is destined for Fame, that’s for sure. Plus they hired singers and dancers for the show instead of making you cringe through Edward Norton in the Woody Allen musical Everyone Says I Love You, and Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia!

Z: SOS. I’m still having nightmares.

She: Plus all the guest stars like Kristen Chenoweth, Idina Menzel and Josh Groban rock — and hit the high notes! I heard Olivia Newton-John and Neil Patrick Harris are guest starring this season. If only Cady Huffman had three names, maybe we could get her on there.

Z: I’ve been waiting for a TV musical that works forever.

She: Didn’t you even try to write one?

Z: No one was buying. I’ve never understood why, but everyone in Hollywood is afraid of musicals. Even Glee is a little afraid of musicals.

She: They do work awfully hard to get the music in there so that it’s “natural.” I think Glee is like Mercedes, from the Fox TV show Glee: it’s got some self-image issues.

Z: Which is ridiculous. It’s a musical. There doesn’t have to be a reason for a song, other than to tell the story, or to sing an emotion. You can tell that they’re dying to break their own stupid rule of making the songs realistic.

She: Who cares if they’re realistic, they just have to be good. And they are.

Z: At least they’re finally realizing that not every song has to start in the choir room anymore.

She: It’s like no one believes that people actually break into song in the middle of the supermarket or at the YMCA. It’s fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.

Z: I was in the supermarket the other day, and Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” was playing on the loudspeakers. I expected the checkers and the bag boys to start dancing, so I started singing along. Then some lady gave me the stink eye.

She: You put a spell on her. But hey. Don’t stop believing. Hold on to that feeling.

Z: I think people should break out into song and dance to express themselves much more frequently. It would sure make the DMV a lot more fun.

She: Remember that when you’re on jury duty next month.

Z: When Velma Takes the Stand I hope the lawyers give us the old Razzle Dazzle.

She: It’s Santa Barbara, not Chicago, honey.

Z: I know. I guess I can’t always get what I want. But I can try sometimes.

She: Yes, dear.

— Share your musical numbers with She and Z by e-mailing .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).

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