Tuesday, February 20 , 2018, 7:07 am | Fair 38º

 
 
 

She Said, Z Said: Is Pool Hopping the Wave of the Future?

Sure, Santa Barbara has an ocean, but there's nothing quite like the therapeutic and recreational qualities of a pool in the desert

She: After staying in four different hotels last week, I think we now qualify as packing and unpacking experts.

Z: Four-star Sherpas. I think we’re parking experts, too.

She: Don’t you mean “self parking,” Mr. “I’d rather walk three miles in the desert sun carrying luggage than spring for the free valet parking?”

Z: Even free valet parking is never free. Although I do keep forgetting the price of the verbal abuse I get for using the self parking.

She: I’m just trying to keep the hidden costs in perspective for you.

Z: It’s a small part of the cost of trying out a new recreational concept for us: the pool-hopping vacation, from Catalina to Vegas.

She: It still strikes me as odd that we’ve turned into pool people.

Z: Only because you won’t go in the water in Santa Barbara.

She: I put my feet in if it’s really hot.

Z: And if your feet don’t have to wear a bikini.

She: I used to think it was strange when people from Santa Barbara vacationed in Hawaii or Mexico, when we have perfectly nice beaches at home.

Z: That was before we had jobs and stress that we needed to get away from. And before Santa Barbara summers turned into parka weather.

She: Now I finally get it. Vacations are about chilling out with a cool drink and a good book.

Z: You do realize you could do that at home, for free.

She: But I rarely do.

Z: We even have a beach parking pass.

She: I know, but if I relax too much at home I feel like I’m slacking.

Z: On the other hand, you can’t go careening through a shark tank in Santa Barbara.

She: True, but I’m not sure why you would want to.

Z: Are you kidding? The waterslide through the shark tank at the Golden Nugget in Vegas was awesome.

She: Swimming up to the sharks was really cool, but the idea of shooting through that tube makes me feel claustrophobic.

Z: You’re going through the tube too fast to notice anything but how fast you’re going.

She: You didn’t notice that shark smacking his lips as you shot by?

Z: No, but I did notice lots of random scrapes and bruises afterward.

She: Worse than the injuries from the wave pool at Mandalay Bay?

Z: The wave pool was very pleasant once we swam out past all of those kids with their sharp little knees and elbows.

She: It’s amazing how much damage a 47-pound thrashing body surfer can do.

Z: Multiply that by 7 million, and that’s a lot of kid-weight to get body-surf-slammed by.

She: Seven million is a total exaggeration. I counted, and there were only 6 million kids.

Z: I did like the lazy river a lot.

She: Me, too, although it would have been much better with half as many people — say, 2 million. If all of them were gone — except the cocktail waitress — I think I would have died and gone to heaven.

Z: Which is one of the reasons why my favorite pool of the week was actually the Pacific Ocean off Catalina Island. The kayaking and the snorkeling were much better than in the pool at the Hilton Las Vegas, and there were a lot fewer people.

She: That was my favorite, too.

Z: You didn’t even go in.

She: I got my toes wet. Besides, I had my book, my cocktail and an ocean view practically all to myself. That’s my kind of vacation.

Z: Yes, dear.

— Tell She and Z about your kind of vacation at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address). Click here for previous She Said, Z Said columns. Follow Leslie Dinaberg on Twitter.

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