Monday, August 20 , 2018, 1:00 am | Partly Cloudy 68º


Captain’s Log: Phone Call Between Mom, Son Goes Amusingly Wrong

I had to share the funniest thing that happened all week at my bait and tackle shop, Hook, Line & Sinker on Calle Real (between Upper State Street and Highway 154).

My daughter, Capt. Tiffany Vague, who manages the store, had a radio fishing show guest appearance scheduled with host Frank Selby, who has been a good industry friend of the family for many years. These guest appearances are done over the phone these days, so she went to the back of the store to use her cell phone to call in to Frank at the radio station at the appropriate time.

Just as she began the interview, a very loud customer came into the store, talking loudly enough to reverberate throughout the store. So Capt. Tiffany retreated to the tiny restroom and shut the door to eliminate as much background noise as possible. The host wanted her in every segment of the radio show, so she was in there for the full hour.

When she came out, there were customers waiting for her who had questions about Vague Custom Rods they were having made for Christmas presents and the person at the counter couldn’t answer them. As Capt. Tiffany began talking with them, her pre-teen son called her cell phone. Apparently he had been trying to call while she had been on the radio show call.

Trying to be polite to the customers who had been waiting and also wanting to address her son’s needs, she spoke briefly to him. The conversation went something like this:

Son: “Mom, where have you been?”

Capt. Tiffany: “I’m sorry, I’ve been in the restroom for the last hour.”

Son: “Are you all right, Mom?”

Capt. Tiffany: “Yes, I was in a meeting.”

Son: “You were in a meeting in the restroom for an hour? With who?

Capt. Tiffany: “With our friend Frank.”

Son [after a long pause]: “Mom, I have to go now because I need to talk to my dad!”

Note: Dad was working next door and knew all about the situation, so he was able to quickly calm down the worried son. This parenting stuff can get interesting!

— Capt. David Bacon operates WaveWalker Charters and is president of SOFTIN Inc., a nonprofit organization providing seafaring opportunities for those in need. Visit to learn more about the organization and how you can help. Click here to read previous columns. The opinions expressed are his own.

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