Wednesday, July 18 , 2018, 5:08 pm | Mostly Cloudy 71º


John Daly: New Year’s Resolutions That Will Make a Difference

​The New Year is upon us. Most of us are thinking about the best way to start 2015. Many of us have vowed to lose weight, stop smoking, stick to a budget, save money, find a better job, get more organized, exercise more or eat better. (Those are some of the top resolutions that people make.)

But, what if rather than direct our resolution to ourselves we focus on what other people need? Two of the top 10 resolutions (according to Amy Kunkle of the Raleigh Etiquette Examiner) are be more patient and be a better person. What if we all started the New Year with those types of resolutions?

So, how can we be better? 

» Respect Others. My No. 1 resolution would be for all of us to respect others more. That means not being judgmental. The next time you realize you are judging someone based on his or her appearance, imagine the person standing in front of you saying, “I’m beautiful.” You’ll start to believe it. Respect others by listening instead of always doing the talking. Don’t push your opinions on others. Think about others’ needs. Stop posting negative comments about other people — including celebrities — on social media.

» Apologize When You Are Wrong. When you know you’ve made a mistake, apologize! It costs you nothing. Others will respect you for it and feel more inclined to want to spend time with you because you have demonstrated you are not all about ego. And, forgive those who have wronged you. Everyone makes mistakes. Give them a chance to make it right. On the other hand, if someone is continuously causing you grief, let the relationship go. It’s not good for either one of you.

» Don’t Be Afraid to Begin New Relationships. If you see someone you like, introduce yourself with a smile and a handshake. Don’t pass up opportunities to make new friendships and be kind to them.

» Don’t Just Constantly Text and Never Call Others. When you do call, leave your full name and phone number for a return call. Did you know that personal phone calls make other people feel good about themselves? Actually connect in the real world. There’s nothing better than a face-to-face meeting to improve the relationship.

» Spend Time with Family Members. Strengthen those blood ties. Show a genuine interest in what your family members are doing. Be “present” with them. Focus on them. Turn off your electronic gadgets when you are together. Believe me; they will totally notice that you care about them when you do. (This works for nonfamily friends and acquaintances, as well.)

» Pay It Forward. It’s not just a great movie. When you do good things for the world and the people in it, you will give yourself a wonderful gift. Helping others is so good for the inside of you! And, when you do, don’t post it on social media! Be anonymously kind in your generosity. Don’t do it for the sake of your image. Do it from the kindness of your heart.

» Shop Locally, Eat Locally and Recognize Where Your Money Is Going. Consumers control the economy, so visit the mom-and-pop coffee shop down the street. Shop at boutiques rather than chains (they aren’t all expensive — trust me).

» Laugh Instead of Frown. Let your happiness envelop others. You will be amazed how you can positively affect someone who is having a bad day.

» Always Be Willing to Lend a Helping Hand. Yes, that isn’t always convenient, but if you stick to it, you’ll always find a hand in return when you need it.

» Ask for Commitments. If you want someone to commit to you, say so. Whether it is for business, personal relationships or otherwise. Be honest and upfront in all your relationships. It’s the best way to gain trust.

I could probably go on and on. The point is to open yourself to the possibility of being there for other people, making them a priority in your life. Can you imagine what the world would be if everyone made those resolutions at the beginning of 2015 and stuck to them?

John Daly is the founder and president of The Key Class, the go-to guide for job search success. Click here to learn more about The Key Class or to get his book. If you have questions about business or social etiquette, just ask John at [email protected]. Connect with The Key Class on Facebook. Follow John Daly on Twitter: @johndalyjrClick here for previous columns. The opinions expressed are his own.

Support Noozhawk Today

You are an important ally in our mission to deliver clear, objective, high-quality professional news reporting for Santa Barbara, Goleta and the rest of Santa Barbara County. Join the Hawks Club today to help keep Noozhawk soaring.

We offer four membership levels: $5 a month, $10 a month, $25 a month or $1 a week. Payments can be made through Stripe below, or click here for information on recurring credit-card payments and a mailing address for checks.

Thank you for your vital support.

Become a Noozhawk Supporter

First name
Last name
Enter your email
Select your membership level

Payment Information

You are purchasing:

Payment Method

Pay by Credit Card:

Mastercard, Visa, American Express, Discover
One click only, please!

Pay with Apple Pay or Google Pay:

Noozhawk partners with Stripe to provide secure invoicing and payments processing.

  • Ask
  • Vote
  • Investigate
  • Answer

Noozhawk Asks: What’s Your Question?

Welcome to Noozhawk Asks, a new feature in which you ask the questions, you help decide what Noozhawk investigates, and you work with us to find the answers.

Here’s how it works: You share your questions with us in the nearby box. In some cases, we may work with you to find the answers. In others, we may ask you to vote on your top choices to help us narrow the scope. And we’ll be regularly asking you for your feedback on a specific issue or topic.

We also expect to work together with the reader who asked the winning questions to find the answer together. Noozhawk’s objective is to come at questions from a place of curiosity and openness, and we believe a transparent collaboration is the key to achieve it.

The results of our investigation will be published here in this Noozhawk Asks section. Once or twice a month, we plan to do a review of what was asked and answered.

Thanks for asking!

Click Here to Get Started >

Reader Comments

Noozhawk is no longer accepting reader comments on our articles. Click here for the announcement. Readers are instead invited to submit letters to the editor by emailing them to [email protected]. Please provide your full name and community, as well as contact information for verification purposes only.

Daily Noozhawk

Subscribe to Noozhawk's A.M. Report, our free e-Bulletin sent out every day at 4:15 a.m. with Noozhawk's top stories, hand-picked by the editors.

Sign Up Now >