Pixel Tracker

Saturday, February 16 , 2019, 4:29 pm | Fair 61º

 
 
 
 

She Said, Z Said: On the Road Again

Traveling with children can be a test of patience ... but not only for the parents. One person's vista may be just desert.

She: There’s nothing like coming home after spending thousands of dollars on a vacation, driving thousands of miles on the road, and having your child say his favorite part of the Grand Canyon was using the hotel key cards.

{mosimage}

Z: In his defense, when you pulled the card out it did make a little green light flash.

She: Worth every penny.

Z: And at least he stopped reading long enough to look at it.

She: Only because we made him.

Z: He’s not completely antisocial. He said his other favorite thing was playing with the kids at our friends’ houses in Vegas and Albuquerque.

She: Yep. Basically we could have had a big playdate for spring break and saved a ton of money.

Z: But then we would have missed out on the iPod experience.

She: True. Koss singing at the top of his lungs was not to be missed. He’s definitely got your gift for filling in blanks when he can’t quite get the lyrics. I don’t think U2 really sings, “Hello, Ola. You are really hair-e-o.”

Z: And I’m pretty sure we heard “Five-Hundred-Twenty-Five-Thousand, Six-Hundred Minutes” five-hundred-twenty-five-thousand, six-hundred times.

She: You also learn a lot when you stay with friends.

Z: I thought you already knew that everyone else’s garage is bigger than our house.

She: That’s not what I mean. I mean stuff like other people really like to cook and hang out at home.

Z: We would, too, if we liked to cook or had a home where we had enough room for a whole other person.

She: Honestly, I kind of agree with Koss. The best part of the vacation was just hanging out with friends. I would have been happy with a big spring break playdate, too.

Z: There’s nothing like those midnight chat sessions.

She: Absolutely — even if half of us are falling asleep and gaseous.

Z: It was the altitude. I mean, it was Ramey.

She: Always the gentleman.

Z: I think America is badly designed. I think it should be designed so that all of our friends live in town with us, and there’s a huge house where we can all play together.

She: With a mom there to cook and clean but not listen in our conversations.

Z: Sounds perfect.

She: And there’s a huge bathtub, where I can go if I need to retreat from everyone for a little while or long while. But no one can talk about me when I leave the room.

Z: You mean like Koss asking that guy in the bathroom in Williams, Ariz., if he had heard of the famous writer, Leslie Dinaberg?

She: Exactly. I laughed until I found out the guy lived in Montecito. Bet he won’t forget my name now.

Z: Oh, well. At least we’ll always remember Archie.

She: That’s true. The beauty of endless car trips is that you do get some lasting family jokes.

Z: When we were writing last week’s column, we were working on the line, “Koss, stop reading and look at the scenery,” and Koss would stop reading and look at the desert and go, “What?”

She: Right. So to stop bugging him, we made up a code name for him.

Z: Jeff.

She: Which seemed fine to me.

Z: But eventually he poked his head up from behind his book, and said, “Who’s Jeff?”

She: We explained. It annoyed him. Turns out, he doesn’t like the name Jeff.

Z: And then, without missing a beat, he said, “Call me Archie,” and went back to reading.

She: You wouldn’t get that if it weren’t for the endless desert.

Z: Yes, dear.

She and Z are finally back home, and will be checking e-mail at [email protected].

Talk to Us!

Please take Noozhawk's audience survey to help us understand what you expect — and want — from us. It'll take you just a few minutes. Thank you!

Get Started >

Support Noozhawk Today

You are an important ally in our mission to deliver clear, objective, high-quality professional news reporting for Santa Barbara, Goleta and the rest of Santa Barbara County. Join the Hawks Club today to help keep Noozhawk soaring.

We offer four membership levels: $5 a month, $10 a month, $25 a month or $1 a week. Payments can be made using a credit card, Apple Pay or Google Pay, or click here for information on recurring credit-card payments and a mailing address for checks.

Thank you for your vital support.

Become a Noozhawk Supporter

First name
Last name
Email
Select your monthly membership
Or choose an annual membership
×

Payment Information

Membership Subscription

You are enrolling in . Thank you for joining the Hawks Club.

Payment Method

Pay by Credit Card:

Mastercard, Visa, American Express, Discover
One click only, please!

Pay with Apple Pay or Google Pay:

Noozhawk partners with Stripe to provide secure invoicing and payments processing.
You may cancel your membership at any time by sending an email to .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).

  • Ask
  • Vote
  • Investigate
  • Answer

Noozhawk Asks: What’s Your Question?

Welcome to Noozhawk Asks, a new feature in which you ask the questions, you help decide what Noozhawk investigates, and you work with us to find the answers.

Here’s how it works: You share your questions with us in the nearby box. In some cases, we may work with you to find the answers. In others, we may ask you to vote on your top choices to help us narrow the scope. And we’ll be regularly asking you for your feedback on a specific issue or topic.

We also expect to work together with the reader who asked the winning questions to find the answer together. Noozhawk’s objective is to come at questions from a place of curiosity and openness, and we believe a transparent collaboration is the key to achieve it.

The results of our investigation will be published here in this Noozhawk Asks section. Once or twice a month, we plan to do a review of what was asked and answered.

Thanks for asking!

Click Here to Get Started >

Reader Comments

Noozhawk is no longer accepting reader comments on our articles. Click here for the announcement. Readers are instead invited to submit letters to the editor by emailing them to [email protected]. Please provide your full name and community, as well as contact information for verification purposes only.

Daily Noozhawk

Subscribe to Noozhawk's A.M. Report, our free e-Bulletin sent out every day at 4:15 a.m. with Noozhawk's top stories, hand-picked by the editors.

Sign Up Now >