Saturday, March 17 , 2018, 11:29 pm | Fair 49º


She Said, Z Said: Sexy, Sexy, Porn, Porn

Don't let the headline fool you; what sells, what doesn't might depend on how you spin it.

Z: Did you read that article in the L.A. Times about that Belgian group on YouTube? I Power?

She: You mean how they “gamed the system” by making people think their nerdy videos are really about sex?


Z: Brilliant, isn’t it? I love the Belge.

She: It’s a classic bait and switch.

Z: They’re consistently in the top most-viewed on YouTube because they name all of their videos “Sexy, Sexy, Porn, Porn.” Or something like that.

She: Don’t forget the thumbnail image of the scantily clad brunette.

Z: As a proud member of the least-common denominator, I’ve got to say that I’m suckered in every time.

She: Add the word “free” in there and you’ve got a perfect direct marketing case study.

Z: Like I said, it’s brilliant.

She: It’s sort of sick, but I accidentally learned a little bit about keyword marketing a few months ago when my column about The Itty Bitty Titty Charity hit Internet gold. Apparently a lot of people go prowling the Net for the word “charity."

Z: Givers. That’s pretty much the only people on the Net: givers.

She: Sex sells just about anything. I heard that Dr. Ruth ad for Clairol Herbal Essences shot its body wash sales through the roof.

Z: That’s crazy, heretical talk. Sex doesn’t sell. Honesty sells. Like when Walter Mondale said he was going to raise taxes.

She: What about the booth babes at trade shows?

Z: Nobody goes to those booths. They’re empty. Everyone’s hanging out at the booth with the free key chains that say InfoMegaTech and have big charts that explain how circuit boards work.

She: Do you really think the Hooters Casino doesn’t believe sex sells?

Z: “Hooters Casino” is redundant. Again, the only reason people go to that casino is because they’re nature fans who love owls.

She: I even read about a men’s hair salon chain called Knockouts. It’s based in Texas, and they call it the “Hooters of haircutting,” with women in dolphin shorts and tight T-shirts cutting hair in places that look like boxing rings.

Z: Women with scissors in a boxing ring? Now I’m just frightened ...

She: You can watch sports, and even have a beer while they style your hair.

Z: … yet oddly intrigued.

She: You know sex sells. You’re just being contrarian.

Z: Here’s the great thing about the Belgians’ videos – half of them are actually roundtable discussions of serious topics. Do you think the women cutting my hair are going to want to talk about Iraq?

She: Is that really why you went in there in the first place?

Z: No. I went because you were nagging me to get my hair cut. Is it my fault there’s a pleasant atmosphere?

She: That’s my point. You could go to Fantastic Sams, but you choose the sexy place, just like everyone on YouTube chooses the sexy-sounding video.

Z: It reminds me of movie trailers where they sell the movie like a comedy, then you get there and it’s King Lear.

She: It all seems so cynical. I understand the impulse for purely commercial products, but creative people should be ready to defend their work for exactly what it is.

Z: I know. Can you even imagine resorting to naming our column something like “Sexy, Sexy, Porn, Porn,” just so we could attract more readers?

She: I can’t imagine sinking that low.

Z: The only thing that would be more embarrassing is if we did that, and we ended up the most-viewed article on Noozhawk this week.

She: Yes, dear.

Share your favorite titles with She and Z at [email protected].


  • Ask
  • Vote
  • Investigate
  • Answer

Noozhawk Asks: What’s Your Question?

Welcome to Noozhawk Asks, a new feature in which you ask the questions, you help decide what Noozhawk investigates, and you work with us to find the answers.

Here’s how it works: You share your questions with us in the nearby box. In some cases, we may work with you to find the answers. In others, we may ask you to vote on your top choices to help us narrow the scope. And we’ll be regularly asking you for your feedback on a specific issue or topic.

We also expect to work together with the reader who asked the winning questions to find the answer together. Noozhawk’s objective is to come at questions from a place of curiosity and openness, and we believe a transparent collaboration is the key to achieve it.

The results of our investigation will be published here in this Noozhawk Asks section. Once or twice a month, we plan to do a review of what was asked and answered.

Thanks for asking!

Click here to get started >

Support Noozhawk Today

You are an important ally in our mission to deliver clear, objective, high-quality professional news reporting for Santa Barbara, Goleta and the rest of Santa Barbara County. Join the Hawks Club today to help keep Noozhawk soaring.

We offer four membership levels: $5 a month, $10 a month, $25 a month or $1 a week. Payments can be made through PayPal below, or click here for information on recurring credit-card payments.

Thank you for your vital support.

Reader Comments

Noozhawk is no longer accepting reader comments on our articles. Click here for the announcement. Readers are instead invited to submit letters to the editor by emailing them to [email protected]. Please provide your full name and community, as well as contact information for verification purposes only.

Daily Noozhawk

Subscribe to Noozhawk's A.M. Report, our free e-Bulletin sent out every day at 4:15 a.m. with Noozhawk's top stories, hand-picked by the editors.

Sign Up Now >