Z: Did you hear that Kumar is going to Washington?

She: No, Kumar is not going to Washington. Kal Penn, the actor who played Kumar, is going to be the associate director of the White House Office of Public Liaison.

Z: I can’t believe they’re giving this raging stoner a job at the White House.

She: He’s a Stanford graduate who’s giving up a $50,000-a-week job to go help the country.

Z: Didn’t he escape from Guantanamo Bay? And then he got high with President Bush. At least that means he has some political experience.

She: You’re very confused. He’s not Kumar any more. Now he’s Dr. Kutner, on House.

Z: You’re right, I am confused. Why are they giving Dr. Kutner a job as a public liaison? Shouldn’t he be the surgeon general?

She: Now you’re being ridiculous. They already filled that job with Dr. McDreamy.

Z: That hardly seems fair. Dr. Kutner seems a lot more qualified than McDreamy. Kutner trained under Dr. House, an irascible genius, while McDreamy is only a wannabe racecar driver.

She: With great hair. You can’t leave out the great hair.

Z: Did I also hear that President Obama’s new chief of staff is Michael Scott from The Office?’

She: That seems like a bad choice.

Z: He does have some excellent managerial experience.

She: I wouldn’t want to be there the day he tries to lead President Obama through a racial-sensitivity-in-the-workplace seminar.

Z: I think he might make Mr. President angry.

She:You don’t want that a piece of that. Watch out for the Rock Obama!

Z: That would be great. I’d love to see a fight between the Rock Obama and Dwight Schrute from The Office. Dwight is going to be agriculture secretary.

She: Perfect. Dwight told me he comes from a long line of patriots.

Z: Dwight told you that.

She: Right after he told me to stop playing with his bobblehead.

Z: I worry that you’re having a hard time differentiating between TV and reality.

She: The weirdest thing I’ve heard is that the White House has hired Hannah Montana to be the president’s daughter.

Z: What about Sasha and Malia?

She: They can’t sing.

Z: Politics is a tough business.

She: The girls will be fine. Fran Drescher and the Super Nanny are going to team up to raise them.

Z: I’d feel more comfortable if Alice from The Brady Bunch would help them. I’m Old School that way.

She: Does it seem strange to you that Kumar would go to Washington without Harold?

Z: It’s because Harold has an even more important mission. It’s top secret, hush-hush, on a need-to-know basis.

She: I won’t tell.

Z: Oh, OK. Harold’s on special assignment to the Starship Enterprise. He’s going undercover as a guy named Sulu.

She: No way. Star Trek?

Z: Yep. It hardly seems fair. Harold gets to go where no man has gone before, and Kumar has to go be another whipping boy for Fox News.

She: So who do you think Kumar will appoint as his White House sidekick? I guess there’s always Neil Patrick Harris.

Z: Not a bad choice. But the biggest rumor I’m hearing is that Kumar’s trying to get Spicoli as his second in command.

She: Sean Penn? In politics? That’s crazy talk.

Z: Yes, dear.

Share your White House casting suggestions with She and Z at leslie@lesliedinaberg.com.