True friends are rare and valuable; easy friends — the world, flesh and dancing with the devil — are unreliable, disappointing even dangerous.
The best friend you could have answers your call, looks for you when in trouble, saves you from yourself, has a way of making you better and staying with you to the end.
This kind of friend is so rare, there is only one of its kind.
The real test of a friend comes when things get rough. Fairweather friends are a dime-a-dozen. Here are a few “litmus tests” for a good friend:
Q: Will my friend take a bullet for me?
My old “buddies” were willing to drink and party with me, but they vanished if it cost them something. Oh sure, maybe a pat on the back, but that’s as far as it went.
A: My Friend did take a bullet for me, as described in Romans 5:6-8: “For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will hardly die for a righteous person, though perhaps for the good person someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
My Friend, Jesus, did all that — way before I was born, before I could sin against Him, ignore Him, refuse Him. Yet there He was, hanging from a cruel Roman cross saying, as written in Luke 23:33-35, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.” That’s a Friend!
Q: Is my friend good for me and not dragging me down?
My worldly friends jumped right on board when it came to carousing, but boy did they run for cover after I became a Christian. Over the years I’ve tried to reach out to them, but my arms aren’t long enough. We have so little in common anymore. They’re not comfortable talking about anything deeper than “How ‘bout them Dodgers?”
A: My Friend does nothing but good for me.
“You know of Jesus of Nazareth, how God anointed Him with the Holy Spirit and with power, and how He went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with Him … They also put Him to death by hanging Him on a cross.” — Acts 10:38-39
Everything He touched was the better for it. And don’t think that startling fact was lost on His followers. They, too, came away changed — for the better, forever.
While His enemies may have succeeded in crucifying Jesus, the damage to the Devil’s kingdom was done, His Spirit filled followers went on to turn the then-known world upside down … to this very day.
Q: Will my friend accept me as I am?
I was a royal mess when Jesus came to me. He didn’t wait for me to come scraping and bowing to Him. No demands to clean up my act, promise to be good, etc. Just love Him and follow Him. He would take care of the rest. And He has!
A: My Friend does accept me, no matter my foolishness.
“And, straightening up, Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?’ She said, ‘No one, Lord.’ And Jesus said, ‘I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on do not sin any longer.’” — John 8:10-12
A real friend tells the truth, whether it stings or not. He wants the best for us and will not let us wallow in self-pity, nor will he hesitate to warn us away from the rocks of our own folly.
Abandon us if we mess up? “He Himself has said, ‘I will never desert you, nor will I ever abandon you.’” — Hebrews 13:5
Q: Will my friend take me home to live with Him?
I might get a night or two on the couch of a friend, but I better not wear out my welcome. I’m thinking of something more permanent.
A: My Friend promised to take me home with Him … forever
In John 14:1-3, Jesus said, “In My Father’s house are many rooms … I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I am coming again and will take you to Myself, so that where I am, there you also will be.”
How About You?
As comforting as they may seem, all your earthly friends can do is hold your hand and shed a few tears at your deathbed. You need Someone who can take you by the hand and carry you across the River, and on to the promised land.
All the “King’s horses and all the King’s men” can’t add up to the value of one truly faithful Friend who endures through eternity.
— D.C. Collier is a Bible teacher, discipleship mentor and writer focused on Christian apologetics. A mechanical engineer and internet entrepreneur, he is the author of My Origin, My Destiny, a book focused on Christianity’s basic “value proposition.” Click here for more information, or contact him at don@peervalue.com. Click here for previous columns. The opinions expressed are his own.