A recent Wall Street Journal article, “What It’s Like to Retire in America After a Divorce,” which described how several individuals navigated retirement expenses after a late-stage split.

That motivated me to write this column.

“Gray divorce” is a growing trend of people divorcing later in life, often in their 60s and beyond. It’s become more common as people live longer, retire later and feel more able to leave unhappy marriages.

Common reasons include empty-nest changes, longer life expectancy, greater acceptance of divorce and increased financial independence, especially among women.

People 50 and older now make up nearly 40% of the divorcing population.

Besides significant emotional issues and impacts on both family and friends. there are clearly potentially big financial issues for couples dubbed “silver splitters.”

Older folks, thankfully, don’t generally have to worry about child custody, which certainly takes some of the emotion off the table.

But there are practical financial issues that include meeting ongoing spending needs of two separate households, housing decisions, benefits, taxes and, of course, splitting assets.

It can be smart to do at least a rudimentary “what if” financial plan to see what life might look like if you move forward with splitting up.

Please note that while not a lawyer, I have some quite personal experience with these issues, having gone through a tough divorce at age 62 after 38 years of marriage that helps me provide insights, but certainly not legal advice.

My most important suggestions from personal experience are to be completely honest, take the moral high road, and to go into discussions with realistic expectations.

In my case, I assumed our assets, which were all accumulated during our marriage, would be split about 50-50.

I proposed this at the beginning and during almost a year of negotiations, and that’s how it ended up. We could have saved a whole lot of money on lawyers and grief if both sides had taken this position, but that’s life.

One of the most important first steps is to create a truly complete and honest financial inventory.

This should include every asset and liability, including bank accounts, brokerage accounts, retirement plans, pensions, real estate values, mortgages and all other debts — all based on fair and accurate values.

It should also include a clear picture of income sources.

And what may be a first for many folks, create a serious budget for both parties. This information will almost certainly serve as the foundation of a divorce settlement — who gets what and how much.

Many assets are easy to split. Savings accounts, investment accounts and IRAs can easily be divided. Under a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, 401(k) and pension plan benefits can be divided. In many cases, life insurance policies can be split.

Probably the most challenging issue is the home and the accompanying mortgage, something that is not easily “split” between the two parties. Many couples also have a vacation home that must be considered.

There may also be a business or professional practice in the mix, which can really complicate things. Many of these entities cannot be owned by the other spouse under business agreement restrictions and/or licensing regulations.

And, of course, existing debts need to be addressed.

Note: Rather than simply trying to divide each item in half, it can be helpful to think “outside the box” by looking at ways to trade rather than trying to split each item in half.

One party could take the house while the other gets a greater share of savings/investments or other assets. Or one party keeps the house and more of the liquid investments while the other keeps the business or professional practice.

This was a valuable strategy in my own divorce.

It can also be important to take tax impacts into account. The Wall Street Journal article noted how one person had to sell the house after it was awarded to them under the divorce. It could only reduce the capital gain by $250,000 rather than $500,000 if the house had been sold before the divorce was final.

And there is a big difference in how an investment account and an IRA are taxed during life and at death. Certainly, a Roth IRA and traditional IRA have dramatically different after-tax values, which should be considered. And these are just some examples.

And don’t forget there are lots of details. New bank, credit card and investment accounts in your name only. Updating life insurance, IRA, 401(k) and other retirement account beneficiary designations. Estate plans will need to be redone.

None of this is easy, highlighting the importance of getting good legal, tax and financial advice. And some level of civility can really help keep both professional fees and stress down.

Finally, there is an old quip about why divorce is so expensive … because it’s worth it. That has certainly proven true for me, and several of those quoted in The Journal article shared similar feelings.

But as Neil Sedaka sang, “breaking up is hard to do.”